I've been obsessed lately about time, memories and moments that are meant to matter and I don't want to overlook them. I want to hold tight to the details of the things I once loved but have passed....like when Jada used to pronounce yellow as "lelow" and she talked with a lisp. I thought she would never outgrow that lisp....but one day she did. And for years I forgot until we watched a home video....it made me cry because I was too busy to notice one day that she was older and outgrowing things.
It's the same thing with Ella- she used to do silly things and she used to call her arm pits "pickles" and when did that stop? I don't remember when but Jada reminded us and it made me smile. And will I forget Ella sucking her thumb or her blanket she carries everywhere and named "Silver"?
But, as I'm typing this I have tears falling into my lap because time is so precious and it goes way too fast. I'm sure I've missed many moments that will never again be remembered because I didn't take note.
I don't want to forget all the little things....the love they have for one another...the way Jada took care of Ella the other day and got her an ice pack when she hurt her foot.....the way they will clear each others dishes off the table after a meal....the way Jada gives Ella pony rides around our living room....the way the girls love to play tickle monster with their daddy...how Jada made a little paper pocket and taped it to her door and her daddy leaves her notes in there.
And I never want to forget the love notes he's left me over the years.....not many but the few he has have made a world of difference in my day.
So today topped the cake and his note made me cry- he was telling the girls what a treasure they had in a mom who stays home with them and who loves them enough to correct them.....and I wonder if the day will come when they realize that's true and will they think I did my best and will they remember the details of their childhood?
Will they remember all the laughs, kisses on boo boos, tickle fights, bedtime talks and prayers? Will they remember all the love that fills our home? I pray they do! I pray what we're doing for them makes a difference and I hope they grow to think of the good ol' days they had here with us.
I pray I never take a moment with them for granted because tomorrow isn't promised and making memories and taking note of the details today could make a world of difference for them.
These girls are the biggest blessing I could ever be entrusted with and I only have one shot at being their mom and directing them to the most important destination of their lives.....the foot of the cross. I pray in all we do we point them to Christ!
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